Ask The Rabbi

It is recommended to perform a thorough cleaning of the vaginal area to clean and remove residual blood before the hefsek tahara, but not for the subsequent bedikot. In order to make sure there is no confusion, let me review the different terms. The Hefsek Tahara refers to the bedika that is typically performed on the 5th day of the period (day 4 for Sefardim). The objective of this bedika is to confirm that the period has ended and allow the woman to begin counting her 7 clean days on the following day. There is another bedika called the Moch Dachuk, which is the bedika that is inserted following the hefsek - but still before sunset - and it remains in the woman for approximately 40 minutes. Assuming both the Hefsek and the Moch do not contain blood, the following day marks the first of her seven clean days. In other words, if an Ashkenazi woman’s period began on Sunday, she would attempt for a Hefsek Tahara and Moch Dachuk on Thursday before sunset. If neither of those 2 bedika clothes have any blood on them, then she is able to begin counting her 7 clean days on Friday and her projected Mikvah night would be the following Thursday night. Back to your question about cleaning the area before the hefsek tahara. The cleaning can be done in whatever way is comfortable for the person, with either a wet cloth or any other way that’s comfortable. One may also perform multiple attempts for a clean hefsek tahara, but it’s important to make sure that one doesn’t do it too many times, as not to irritate the area. Therefore, it’s a good idea to wait in between each Bedikah so that the area has time to recover, remoisten and won’t get too dry which would lead to bleeding when irritated. The truth is there are some Poskim who require one to wait a little bit between each attempted Hefsek Taharah, but others don’t require this wait time, especially if a Moch Dachuk will be used.

The Mirena is a hormonal IUD which may affect your cycle; a delay of your period is completely normal and there is no issue at all. Menstruation may be reduced or disappear completely with the device (sometimes it can push it off for a year!). For some people, the delay or disappearance of the period is actually one of the biggest benefits in using Mirena because it extends your “pure” status and permits you to your husband.

This is very normal. For some women, even minimal breastfeeding can prevent their period. If there are any other unusual signs or questions then it should be looked into further.

I’m sorry to hear about your loss, May God comfort you among the other mourners of Zion and Jerusalem. Regarding your question, marital relations is not allowed during Shivah and some poskim would advise pushing off the mikvah until after shivah. Other poskim disagree and allow the woman to immerse even during her husband’s shivah, so long that they do not engage in marital relations. The question if other forms of intimacy is permissible during the shivah window is another debate in the poskim and many advise the couple to be stringent.